writing?

Have a writing project I am working on with a friend and I feel like a slacker. 

it's not a typical subject and even though it will be a romance of sorts ... the umm people  we are writing about - likely to land us in a bit of hot water with our friends, family.... Church ... :::sigh::: but it's amazing how we both connect on this - we hammered out a rough outline in 2 hours, how many chapters etc. 

There were many possibilities where we could have gone with it but the romance aspect is the one that has been done the least. 

And no I can't tell you  

Other matters.... both kiddos have been sick this past week. The younger one is finally back to his old self today - hmm after having chatter in my ear non stop all morning then decide that he needs to sing to every song on his playlist I"m not sure if I am happy about that or not LOL  I am joking there of course....well mostly anyway! Please don't tell me to give him ear plugs cause that would only make it worse! He then sings louder because he can't hear himself and there is no music or other voices to cover his a bit. 

I love my boy I sure do - but I know he is NOT the next American Idol! 

That same friend I am writing with has committed herself to helping me ready the house for photos/showing. 

Yes we have to sell the house. 

Gotta tell you I am not all that upset about it. 

Neither is the Young Man. 

Having both my mom and aunt pass away in this house and there always being a struggle to maintain it - I don't have too many good memories here. 

I feel bad for Young Man - aside from the apartment over my sister in laws garage this is the only other home he really remembers.  Eldest could care less - home is where my family is he tells me ( God I love that boy! ) Hub seems to want to hold onto it at all costs. He seems to think that in a short period of time the market is going to bounce back and we will be able to recoup a lot of the $ that was put into the house - ain't gonna happen. At least not for 5-10 more years. I really don't want to stay here THAT long. That being said -we got the Comparative Market Analysis yesterday.  Hosue was bought for $250 in 2005 real estate agent says she wouldn't list it for more than $179 right now ( her personal opinion) I knwo hub is going to have a fit at any # under $200 but truth of the matter.... he and I have not put any $ into this house other than the mortgage and taxes the last year and a half. The taxes will get paid back to us by the estate - the mortgage is to be considered rent- fine with me as you cannot rent this size house anywhere for what the mtge is. 

Bottom line is - there is not much money to be gained by selling the house. i think the cousins are going to erroneously judge it by NY standards and demand a higher asking price - hopefully the lawyer can convince them not going to happen. It is possible he could talk them into signing a quit claim deed and then we could get the house in our name stay here a while and fix all the things that need fixed in order to make it more appealing to buyers - but I understand hub's perspective.  I don't want to invest $2000 in filling in the fool and putting sod down only to get more $ for my un appreciate cousins who couldn't lift a finger to help us out when my aunt was alive but are now more than willing to take whatever money they can get their hands on.... whatever - we do not need to wait for the sale of this house in order to purchase ours - mainly because this one is not in our name so ... if we can come up with a down payment, fix our credit a bit then we are good to go. Not sure if any estate funds once they are received from the 2 institutions will be given out prior to sale of the house - if not that might make cousins amenable to a quit claim as well who knows... so many unknowns 

Whatever the case may be the house does need a good cleaning and decluttering so... I best get to getting dressed my wonderful friend who I am so grateful for will be here in an hour!! 

well....

13 years ago today the man who taught me to dance by standing on his feet, made me promise never to date till I was 16 and walked me down the aisle at my wedding lost his battle with Hep C and MS  

While the road we all traveled with him was never easy - I miss him. I know he would be tickled to spend time with his grandsons who I find are more like him everyday ( God help us all) 

Hope you are dancing with Mommy - I love you Daddy! 

happy happy joy joy :-)

Things here have been going swimmingly the last couple of weeks. 

I found out that I am definitely NOT going to be a Grandmom yet - Praise the Good Lord. 

Eldest passed his driver's test even with hitting the curb multiple times whilst parallel parking ( they obviously understand that A) you aregoing to kill anyone parallel parking and B) there is NO WHERE around here where it's necessary!) 

Little Man to be know from here on as Young Man - had his testing for his hearing and while he still has fluid built up in both ears there is NO nerve damage in the ears!!!  the ENT thinks the fluid is from allergies and gave him a nasal spray to use and will recheck him in 2 months!  YAY!! 

Hub got me the most beautiful ANTI- Valentine gift.  A gorgeous Trollbeads bracelet with lots of different beads on it for things in our lives! My Fave is this purple swirly one ~ it represents that our lives are a whirlwind!!   LOL  Certainly true! 

I have started REALLY writing again - as in on an actual project with someone I know so there is also accountability! Go figure! 

Things are moving along with the estate and house situation ~ found out our credit scores are NOT as bad as originally thought and the mortgage guy advised us to get a credit card! At first I was floored - then it kinda made sense.    I thought at first he was trying to talk me out of it LOL ~ the one he suggested is $95 for each credit card you want, a $75 annual fee and an interest rate of almost 50%!  When I got up off the floor he proceeded with his explanation.  When we get and activate the card we are to go out and purchase a tank of gas. Put the card away. When the bill comes pay it but leave $10 as a balance. You are only charged interest on your revolving credit ( your balance) which is the $10 so the interest is less than $5 ~ ok not so bad.  then go out and repeat the process.  By doing this it will add an additional 15 points onto the credit score ( 5 for each one of the three reports) each month!  WE only have to do this for TWO MONTHS in order to get a credit score that will enable us to get a decent mortgage! 

WILD 

Tuesday my realtor comes to look through this house. 

According to the lawyer we have been *renting* the house from the estate for the last year and a half so we will not be getting our mortgage payments back but we will be getting back what we have paid out in taxes! Wahoo!  We are also to be reimbursed for anything we lay out to get the house *legal* and marketable to sell! We have an apartment that the previous owners never pulled permits for. Talked to our town hall and found we can correct the situation for only $2-300 - not too bad an investment when that will ensure we get as close to asking price as possible! 

so things are moving forward and looking good here! 

Soon we start the task of actual house hunting ..... Hubby is dreading it ~ I'm quite excited!  I'm sure between me and sister in law and the realtor - we will be able to narrow the field down so we only take him to see the most serious of contenders! 

Oh that part about not being a Grandmom! Several weeks back the boys girlfriends mother came to see me - she informed me the kids were having sex - how did she know this? well they had it the night before and the condom broke! LOVELY. We talked and decided to take the girl to the pharmacy for the plan b pill and we thought all was good until the girl went to her mom to inform her she was *late* Long story short she peed on the stick it was neg - but we all know how that can go so we waited ....and waited ...and waited... and finally this past Wednesday we found out she was DEFINITELY not pregnant!! It was the same day the boy got his license! OH HAPPY DAY! 

Well must go break up a fight in the other room ( the boys ) some things never change ...LOL 

frustrated

it appears as though the husband thinks that just by avoiding me he can avoid all discussions on the topics of money, the estate issues we are dealing with and the decisions that were supposed to have been made and told to the attorney YESTERDAY. Let me tell you the lawyer... Not a Happy camper. How do I know this? Oh it may be the 3 phone calls I received from him yesterday - none of which I answered because really what was I going to say? " Oh sorry sir don't have any answers yet because apparently everything under the sun but this is important to my husband ?"   I KNOW what he would have told me - he's told it to me before. I AM the executrix and legally I do not have to wait for my husband's thoughts, opinions or concerns on the matter. I know this - I know that also by avoiding the lawyer for much longer it could cause ME legal problems as then the Surrogate of the county will be informed I am not performing my duties as commissioned and guess what?  I will be held in contempt and jailed! 

I thought about it - long and hard. 

At one point I really thought the break from EVERYTHING would be really nice. 

Not quite sure it would be worth a criminal record thought 

So now what do I do?! 

He made sure to leave very quietly this morning before I was ever up ( this after making sure he didn't even leave the office last night until I was going to bed ( it's an hour away) Let me tell you this was no small feat for him - because every morning he manages to make enough noise to wake the dead - seriously - and THIS morning?? Not a sound. So like he tells the kids - I know he can do it - it's just a matter of not trying and in not trying it comes across as very inconsiderate indeed! It wouldn't bother me so much I guess if he was getting ready and making all this noise at NORMAL hours - but when he is getting ready to leave at 4 and 5 a.m yeah that is being a butt! 

Also not discussed was what I need as far as cash flow for bills and such the next 2 weeks - the amount he left in the joint account is laughable as it wouldn't even cover groceries at this point - he FORGOT to budget money for groceries last pay period ( 2 weeks ago) so we are really really depleted in even the most basic of things. 

I am just tired and frustrated -I feel like every single thing is a battle. There are enough demons out there in the world trying to knock down marriages and weaken people to their core I don't think it's fair to have it happening from within  

On a good note Little Man did amazingly well on his report card - it is so nice to see his self esteem up where it should be! This let's me know that having him placed in the self contained class was definitely the right move for him ! Since he isn't worried about who he is going to meet in the halls, or if he will be on time to his next class or what the next teachers personality and expectations are he has way more time to focus on his work!  this teacher also does not believe in homework! He feels that these kids have a hard enough time holding it together for the day that he doesn't need to add any pressure to their home lives!  I love this - as it allows Little Man to be active in various after school activities and that is def good for him! 

Eldest is taking his road test next week after a communication mishap between him and his dad ( imagine that :-/) and will be lining up some babysitting jobs etc to earn gas and insurance money! We also have an appointment with the Air Force recruiter next week about him going into the Air Force this summer and seeing what we have to do as far as pulling med records etc.  So lots to do above and beyond the estate b.s. - we also have graduation and prom to figure out .....not to mention he is going to South Carolina to see the love of his life graduate from Marine boot camp! OY That boy's life is like a soap opera! 

so there ya have it the good the bad and the ugly ....... I bet some of yas are now wishing I would stop blogging altogether - but seriously if I had to keep this all in? I would implode ! 

So have a good day - go count your blessings -because there are plenty if you LOOK for them! 

Over and Out ~ D 

tomorrow

is my Momma's 67 th birthday. On April 2 she will be gone 6 years - that's half of Little man's life.  As of now he has spent just as much time without her as he did with her  Breaks my heart he still pines for her so..... I do as well but I'm her daughter, her only child......never mind I spend lots of time wishing she were here to help me with the bullshit going on with my cousins - and no it's not lost on me that if she were here I wouldn't be going through any of it :::sigh::: 

Super Bowl Party with the Super Catholics yesterday :-/  I cannot believe the Knights of Columbus wanted to make it a Catholic only even knowing full well that one of their Officers wives is not Catholic.  Oh they are also starting up the Columbiettes - all Cathloic woman version of the Knights. Apparently we need a formal group with officers to serve them all their Grand Poobah crap!? 

yeah I'm a bit snarky on the matter but -they started it with their less that Christian attitude toward others! 

I was appalled at Little Man's behavior yesterday. A young man approached him after my nieces baptism wanting to get to know him etc. and Little Man kept walking away telling him he doesn't talk to strangers etc.  it was very awkward and uncomfortable - later I sent Eldest to apologize and introduce himself to the kid - he really seemed nice etc. and I feel bad Little Man was so rude. 

ugh 

Ok now the house is being taken over by kids ... so I must depart and yeah ...pray for me ...LOL